Being concise and keeping it simple in IELTS writing.
I quite often get essays that contain ‘flowery’ or convoluted sentences and vocabulary which makes it hard to understand what point is being made. My advice here is to keep your wording simple, direct to the point and concise.
It seems that many students try too hard to use ‘complex sentences’ or ‘high level’ vocabulary and completely miss the point of communication, so in the end the reader (the examiner in this case) has trouble understanding.
Some students like to memorise lists of words and then just put those into the essay without actually knowing fully what the word really means. This will end up ruining your band score in coherence and cohesion as well as grammar and vocabulary. In fact, complex sentences are not actually complex or complicated, here is a lesson on those, click here to see it
Many IELTS candidates use very complicated sentences or memorised phrases thinking that they are impressing the reader. To be honest, this is not impressing anyone and it is having an opposite effect. The IELTS examiners are trained to spot memorised phrases and will most probably mark these kinds of essays down to a Band 5 or 6 for coherence and cohesion.
In the IELTS marking criteria, coherence, cohesion, grammar and vocabulary are linked. This means that if your sentence structures, grammar and vocabulary are not right then it will affect the overall ability to understand what is being communicated in the essay. Bad news for overall coherence and cohesion as well as grammar and vocabulary.
The same goes for Writing task 1. Just keep it clear and concise.
گاهی‌اوقات رایتینگ‌هایی را تصحیح کردم که حاوی جملات و واژگان “تزئینی” یا پیچیده بوده و درک متن را دشوار کرده است. توصیه من در اینجا این است که متن خود را ساده، To the point و مختصر بنویسید.
به نظر می رسد بسیاری از دانشجویان برای استفاده از واژگان “جمله‌های پیچیده” یا “سطح بالا” بسیار تلاش می‌کنند و کاملاً نقطه ارتباط را از دست می دهند، بنابراین درک آن برای خواننده (اگزمینر) مشکل مشکل خواهد بود.
برخی از دانش آموزان دوست دارند لیستی از کلمات را بخاطر بسپارند و سپس بدون اینکه معنای واقعی کلمه را درک کنند، آن را در رایتینگ قرار دهند. مطمئن باشید که نمره coherence and cohesion و همچنین در grammar و Vocabulary خوبی نخواهید گرفت. از نظر من، جملات پیچیده (complex sentences) در واقع پیچیده (complex or complicated) نیستند، در اینجا یک درس مربوط به این موارد است ، برای دیدن آن اینجا را کلیک کنید.
بسیاری از داوطلبان آیلتس تصور می‌کنند که با جملات بسیار پیچیده یا عبارات حفظ شده، می‌توانند اگزمینر را تحت تأثیر قرار بدهند و نمره بالا کسب کنند. صادقانه بگویم، این جملات هیچ کس را تحت تأثیر قرار نمی‌دهد و نتیجه ای معکوس دارد. اگزمینرهای آیلتس آموزش دیده اند تا عبارات حفظ شده را بیابند و به احتمال زیاد نمره‌ای بین 5 الی 6 برای معیار coherence and cohesion شما در نظر می‌گیرند.
بنابراین اگر ساختار جمله‌ها، دستور زبان و واژگان شما درست نباشد، بر نمره کلی درک محتوای رایتینگ شما تأثیر می‌گذارد. موارد ذکر شده برای رایتینگ تسک 1 هم صدق می‌کند. پس رایتینگ آیلتس را ساده و مختصر بنویسید.
معنی concise و convoluted در دیکشنری آکسفورد
مثال برای مقدمه پیچیده و مختصر
کدامیک از مقدمه‌های زیر بهتر و صحیح‌تر است؟
Task question 1
Example 1:
There are global concerns over environmental problems caused by the growth of air travel. Tax hikes on tickets have been suggested as a measure to limit the number of air travellers. I completely disagree with this because more research and development to reduce carbon emission should be the focus instead of taxing travellers.
Example 2:
As air travel gains more prominence among the populace, there are great concerns over the environmental problems as a result of airports and flights. Putting higher tax on tickets has been suggested as a measure to control air travel from certain quarters, but I am inclined to disagree with this. More research and development should rather instigate and reduce carbon emission from aviation sources, while environmental assessment tests should be looked into in the positioning of airports.
If you said the first example then you are right. This is because it is concise and contains a clear thesis statement.
The second example is far too long at 68 words and it is going into the topic of building airports. There is also language used that does not really fit well such as:
- gains more prominence among the populace..
- control air travel from certain quarters…
- should rather instigate and reduce carbon emission from aviation sources..
- should be looked into in the positioning of airports…..
This is a little hard to follow and seems to almost be going off-topic. It is too ‘convoluted’ and misses the point of writing.
An essay must convey ideas clearly with the reader in mind. Ask yourself these questions:
- Does this make sense to someone reading it for the first time?
- Is it clear what point I am making?
- Is my language too ‘convoluted’?
- Am I still on topic?
Task question 2
Example 1:
Of all mankind’s manifold creation, the internet must take pride of place. But sadly, not all information on the internet is true, which makes it a victim of its own portrayal as an unreliable platform to some extent. Perhaps this issue can be battled by constructing some authenticating software and by other means that can lay aside the issues.
Example 2:
The internet is a huge source of knowledge which has enabled people worldwide to learn new things. However, not everything on the internet can be trusted, therefore, regulations need to be implemented to curb the spread of fake information and misleading websites.
If you chose the second example then you are right. The first example is way off, even as a native speaker I can’t completely understand the points that are being made. This is a good example of being too ‘convoluted and flowery’. Let’s look at example sentences from the first example.
- mankind’s manifold creation…
- take pride of place….(never use idioms in IELTS essays)
- makes it a victim of its own and portrayal…
- this issue can be battled by constructing some authenticating software ….
- lay aside the issues.
This is trying too hard to impress the reader but fails. It will be most likely be marked as irrelevant by the IELTS examiner.
Here is a conclusion from another essay
Example 1:
In a nutshell, this opinion is double-edged sword, so I can’t agree fully. It is important to use money depending on cases. For instance, in case of people in hospital which are relatively prevented with ease, you should pay for the prevention more.
- In the conclusion above the student has used the phrase ‘In a nutshell’ . This is memorised and it is also informal, it doesn’t belong in an IELTS essay.
- There is also an idiom: ‘a double-edged sword’ . My advice is to stay away from using idioms in IELTS essays as most of the time they are informal and it is easy to use them incorrectly.
- The last 2 sentences were hard to understand, poor coherence here.
The example above is trying too hard to use grammar and vocabulary that the student is not familiar with.
جمع بندی و نکات
برای ایجاد مهارت‌های گرامری و ساخت کلمات، وقت و تلاش لازم است. از دستور زبانی استفاده کنید که راحت باشید، مطمئن باشید با گذر زمان از ساختارهای پیشرفته تری استفاده خواهید کرد. در اینجا هیچ راه‌حل سریعی وجود ندارد زیرا توسعه زبان انگلیسی زمان‌بر است. خواندن متن‌های مختلف، برای ساختن کلمات و لغات مرتبط با موضوعات رایتینگ یک روش صحیح یادگیری است، اما در عین حال زمان‌بر است.
یاد بگیرید که جملات پیچیده رایتینگ چه هستند و نوشتن آنها را تمرین کنید. برای کسب نمره باند 7 نیازی به استفاده از گرامر سطح بالا نیست. در واقع، مقاله باند 9 از ساختارهای گرامری کاملاً سرراست استفاده می کند و خواندن آن بسیار آسان است.
هنگام تمرین رایتینگ، سوالات زیر را از خود بپرسید.
- آیا این برای کسی که برای اولین بار آن را می خواند منطقی است؟
- آیا مشخص است که من چه نکته ای را عنوان می‌کنم؟
- آیا زبان نوشتن من “پیچیده” است؟
- آیا من هنوز در مورد موضوع سوال می‌نویسم؟
- آیا من عباراتی را حفظ می‌کنم و آنها را در رایتینگ قرار می‌دهم؟